Today is mine and my husbands 10 year anniversary and it had me thinking back on all the great and not so great times we have shared thus far and the reasons why we've been going on so strong.
1. Communication is key. Everyone says this and it's true. Your significant other will never know what is on your mind unless you speak up. You need to be comfortable enough around your partner to be able to say anything without feeling embarrassed or scared. If something is troubling you, let them know. No one is a mind reader and the only way others can gauge your feelings is by speaking up and letting them know what's on your mind.
2. Consideration for each other. I see so many couples hurting each other for no good reason. My husband and I have tremendous amounts of consideration for each other. If we are angry at one another we wait awhile and cool off before exploring the topic and talking it out in a calm manner. There is no reason to say things in the heat of the moment that's just going to hurt the other person. Words are very powerful and they do hurt. What's more...once it's been said, you can't take it back.
3. Respect. My husband and I love and respect one another to not nag each other. Nagging is a huge relationship breaker. If something needs to be done, I ask him if he's doing anything at the moment. If he is the task I need him to do can wait till later. Unless it's an emergency...nothing needs to be done so bad you have to nag each other to do it. Show respect for your S/O and they will do the same for you. Nagging will get you nowhere but to the start of a heated argument that will completely negate my #2 reason. 9 times out of 10 my husband is happy to do what I ask of him and vise versa. He's there for me if/when I need him and I'm there for him when he needs me.
4. Cut the seriousness and laugh. The great thing about our relationship is that we love to act like total nerds and have a good time. We make up stupid songs and act like total goofs to the point that our daughters (or strangers) look at us strange and you know what...we don't care. Laughing is good for you and it's even better when you're laughing and goofing off with the person you love.
5. Have things in common. There are many things my husband and I have in common and there are a few things that we don't. But having those things in common is a great way to interact with one another and it gives you so much to do and talk about.
6. Partake in things your partner likes. Nothing says "strong relationship" when you do things one another likes, just because they like it. It can be about a favorite movie your partner likes, his nerdom, music...anything. My husband got me into video games and now I play more than he does. He also created a monster out of me when he got me into anime as well. Just try to participate with something your S/O does...who knows...you may enjoy it more than you thought you would and that will bring you two that much closer together. It may also incite him to participate in things you like to do as well. I'm an avid reader and before my hubby met me...he never touched a book. Now he reads all the time.
7. Enjoy your personal time alone. Everyone needs some time to themselves every once in awhile. Face it, if you're stuck to one another 24/7 things can get tense and you will begin to annoy the heck out of one another. While my husband is off doing his own thing whether it be playing video games, working on his computer, yard work...etc, I'm off doing my own thing.
8. You do not need to go out to spend time together. We like to go out occasionally and when we do it's mainly just to eat. We rarely get to go out because finding someone to watch the girls is a bit trying, so we've managed to enjoy ourselves after the tots are in bed for the night. We'll order take out and snuggle up on the couch to watch something. Sometimes we'll hop on our computer and spend a night playing SWTOR or some other online game together.
9. Relationships are not 50/50. Rather I try to give 100% and so does my husband. We work hard to keep a smile on each others faces and to ensure the happiness of our daughters. No matter how many times we get upset or angry at one another we always try to work through things and have smiles on our faces at the end of the day.
10. Consideration. Respect. This is pretty much what it all boils down to. Showing respect for one another. Taking the other persons feelings into consideration. I know it's easy to be selfish and only think of your own feelings at times, but you have to try and push through that and think about how the other person is feeling as well.
Granted, we are far from a perfect couple, we just try our best to show each other the same courtesy we would like bestowed on us. We do have our arguments, we do get on each others nerves and we do get mad at one another but we make it a point to work it out and not give up on one another.
